A few months ago, I started feeling (in a bad way) like a sex object to my husband. Like he was just using me to satisfy his sexual needs.
What had happened to dating as foreplay? How long could he expect us to have great sex without being romanced?
I felt helpless, hopeless, angry and frustrated. Oh how I wished I knew how to make myself feel like having sex with my husband, even though he was too busy to take me out on dates…
That’s when I accidentally came across the solution to my problems. It wasn’t clear to me at first. But, what worked for me, was to understand men better.
What Do You Mean By ‘Understand Men Better’?
When you begin to understand men better, it means you begin to see into your husband’s heart. You begin to finally begin to understand why men behave the way they do – what drives him; what de-motivates him, etc…
And as you understand how men think, you’ll finally understand why your husband is too busy to take you out on dates. Plus, you’ll realize the REAL reason why your husband doesn’t need to go out on dates in order to feel like having sex with you. (Hint: it’s not because men have sex on their minds all the time).
The truth is, your husband has good reasons for behaving the way he does.
And more often than not, these are actually loving reasons. And that’s why learning how to understand men better is so important.
Understanding Men Better Means You Get To Avoid MISUNDERSTANDINGS.
Wouldn’t you agree that when you don’t understand men, it’s easy to mis-understand your husband’s actions… which usually only leads to bigger problems?
- You wonder whether he still loves you…
- You start to resent his behavior…
- You feel helpless and frustrated – not knowing how to solve your marriage problems…
And then what? You find that the problem of your husband not having enough time to take you out on dates, is only the beginning of one of your many growing problems within your marriage… (oh dear.)
But Can Understanding Men Better Truly Make You Feel More Sexual?
Absolutely! Because when you think about it, what really makes a woman feel like having sex with her husband? It’s the feeling of being CONNECTED with him. That’s the purpose of going on dates, isn’t it? To build a stronger connection…
Still, How Can You Feel Connected To Your Husband When He’s Too Busy And Has No Time For You?
What you need is a microscope to look into his heart. A microscope that doesn’t need you to spend time with your husband in order to understand him better.
Did you know you don’t even need to talk to your husband to understand him better? In fact, the three best ways I’ve found, of how to connect with your husband, without talking to him, is by:
- Using visualization(s);
- Taking a course(s);
- Reading book(s) about it.
And that’s what I did. I did visualizations. I read books. I attended courses about how to understand men better.
Which Brings Me Back To My Own Story…
My husband and I used to have a great sex life. But a few months ago, he suddenly got very busy with his work. Too busy to take me out on dates. And even though I did my best to be supportive, I found it harder and harder to have sex with him.
Soon, I noticed I wasn’t feeling as enthusiastic as sex as before. My husband noticed it too. It affected him.
But mostly, it affected me.
- I couldn’t enjoy sex.
- I started to get a bit naggy.
- I felt angry.
- Impatient with him.
And worst still, I felt frustrated with myself. I was trying so hard not to blame him (because he had valid reasons for not dating me). But still, I desperately wanted him to take me out on a date before trying to have sex with me.
All this took a toll on our relationship.
Finally, I read in an e-book, that
- A man’s job is how he identifies himself as a man;
- Most of the reason men work is to support their families;
- When a woman complains, a man feels she doesn’t appreciate his efforts, so he’s demoralized. Eventually he becomes emotionally numb, or he leaves.
These words about men gave me the microscope I needed to see into my husband’s heart.
Immediately, I felt more appreciative towards my husband. Not surprisingly, these appreciative feelings made me feel more connected to him… which allowed me to keep my heart open to his… which amazingly, made me eager to have sex with him, which led to us having great sex!
So To Summarize…
The way to have great sex with your husband, even when he’s too busy to take you out on dates, is to understand men better. Why? Because understanding men better gives you a microscope to see into your husband’s heart (even without talking to him).
This is important because it will help you to avoid MISUNDERSTANDINGS about your husband ‘s actions. (Misunderstandings which can lead to bigger problems in your marriage.)
While you may not think that understanding men is related to your sexuality, it actually helps you to feel more CONNECTED to your husband. (The feeling of connection, which is vital for women to have, before they can feel sexually attracted to a man.)
And once you feel connected to your husband, your heart will open up to him… which will leave you available to receive his sexual advances – an expression of his love for you.
Best of all, having great sex together will bring you closer together as a couple. How do I know? Because now, even though I still feel like my husband treats me like a sex object, I’m flattered by it. What’s more, after having great sex, my husband takes his own initiative to make plans for the two of us to have dates and spend quality time together. Isn’t it amazing that we both get to win?